whole life ive been fucked up
thinking i could live without you
treating you like my worst enemy
clarity comes the only opposition is me
they said be sober and youll be happy
truth be told aint no happiness left for me
earned and killed for my respect
taxes created a killer, whatd you expect?
love me during war but after just neglect
traded my life for minimum wage check
with the idea i was sent to protect
my past paints a painful picture
taught by tragedy, agony is my architect
say a prayer for me say a prayer for me
actually dont waste your breathe on me
not like you ever made life fair for me
R.I.P to all the fucks I gave
just look at the monster you've made
no love for soldiers when wars over
self medicate, pains too real sober
3 bottles of pills, 5th of whiskey, half a 12 pack of beer
loaded pistol of PTSD, flag in hand my time is near
put my uniform on, cause today's my last day
perfectly painted my portrait of pain this way
every shot in my vein is another step
past the pain but that much closer to death
memories haunt me but they call it surviving
living or dying see me still stuck suffering
mistake's help mold you ,just don't let them define you
never leave anyone behind, love see's it through
the frustration is crippling the guilt will blind you
emotionally bleeding, a lonely rendezvous
all I know is hopeless, a feeling I'm used to
promised I'd never leave, but what does a coward do
turns his back on the best friend and love he ever knew
then he preaches about integrity,and staying true
but holds none, cause he turned his back on himself too
honor, integrity,respect everything he knew
all became lost, I lost it all... when I lost you
betrayal is a double edged sword
you can not betray someone
without betraying yourself too