Speedway to Death: Dismal Method for A Crystal Mess

Foresaw my suicide from holding onto A Tennessee Promise

A life turned lie but tragedy still remains unfinished

Dying alone without my body feeling far from privileged

Staring at heaven from behind the bars in Motel Memphis

My future is seen as lost from crystal fogged nights

Nothing is as it seems with no sleep and dark lights

Selling to broke fiends dealing no judgement only a vise

Inside a cell waiting for punishment and Miranda's rights

Prison bound pipe dreams while sitting in county jail

Politics, riots and screams, no one fights pass if they only fell

Shivering shirtless while hungry and hopeless inside of a holding cell

Poverty pays no bail as door opens to a destiny without heaven...Welcome to Hell

Guilt Triggered, Life Imprisoned

From my prison of freedom I stare out at the world

More love lost, no love found, pointless past with no return

Guilty hearts from glass pipes, wars regrets bring sleepless nights

Failed future from a painful past, pull my trigger and turn off my lights

Nothing's Left, Love's Lost, My Last Rites

No love from my family, disrespected by my own people
Survial found within a lifestyle seen far less then legal
But people became so quick to judge me without an education
They got me in an endless election so next time don't plea for my protection

Iraq's fatal truth, it was them or me and since I'm still breathing
It's not my mother fucking mama full of tears sitting there still grieving
From bullied on the playground to feared in my city
I'm suicidal homicidal so I invite you to die with me

I went from fighting worldly terror to fighting personal tragedy
Now its me against the world since no one will stand with me
Truth sought but confussion caught when you see me walking alone at night
But please remember just because I stand alone doesnt mean I'm not right

Broken Hearts and Glass Pipes

Glass hearts break faster then pyrex pipes
Weak emotions broughten on by sleepless nights
Like non existant loyalty from the stars and stripes
Emotions run manic so I beg for my last rights

My emotions become beaten then traded into her heartless vanity
Explosions take my sanity, but from love I become a casualty
Hours spent wishing to be like them, heartless like the tin man
A good heart and a good man with nothing but struggles that they can't comprehend

Labeled me as lost and wrote me off as hopeless
Nightmares blur reality, my pleas become voiceless
Scorned and hated then shown a shortcut to hell
Love is blind, lies turn men vunelable, her truth I can not tell

Life Shattered, Blood Splattered ( Fuck the Government)

All you do is bury your secrets down within

Mind races while it eats at your emotions like a batch of bad heroin

No freedom to more drugs, is this what we always wanted to become

No love from society, is this still the place I'm supposed to call home

*

I fight to fix my differences yet you call it ignorant

I'll  still call it following the united states government

Back then I loved my country would've had no problem dying in battle

Now days my bravery is viewed wasted, drowning up shit creek, lost without a paddle

*

Reguardless if you're a lifetime civilian or a lifetime soldier

Life's hard when every night is a constant battle or a struggle

Tears I've shed blur the mental picture of my mother that wakes me up every morning

Blood splats across the wall, drenching my American flag with painful truth and red tears, one more bullet, no more warning

The End

My country needed me, I was there.

I needed my country, no one is here.

My family needed me, I was there.

I needed my family, no one is here.

hurt, homeless and heart broken

no pride, no love, pain is not soft spoken

as far as hatred? I hold none

I won't hold a smile, happy days are all gone

my mother will have to carry my painful burden 

because some choices are non refundable

I'm on my path to see the reaper or maybe the warden

smile, wipe your tears away remember me as a symbol

because with or without my life.... isn't life wonderful

Sorry, I'm short on time so this is not even close to a good poem but I wanted to get some of that out while I still have the option available.

Thank you to everyone who always read my poetry. 

Perfect Paradox (Love Never Lost II)

Don't be a prisoner within your own thoughts,
Or material things, lose the hate, lose the gunshots
Life is judged off the love you chose to export
Heart without love is a hand without heaven's passport
*
Hateful words never resolved the violence
But you attain wisdom through kind silence
Knowledge is power when most men stand adversity,
Power corrupts good men,heavy darkness held by human history
*
If you learn to love then you know how to live,
Hatred lets them take but love continues to give
Live your life and spin the wheel of karma,
Peace of mind if you subtract the drama
*
I've found peace on the borderline of gallows,
Far from perfect still walking within the shadows,
When you find yourself you've found your happiness,
Love isn't gone so refuse to conform to heartless
*
Love is never lost just continue breathing,
Love never dies despite your body ageing
Love until it hurts because after the pain is lost,
Only love is left inside of a perfectly painted paradox

Infanticide

infant memories hold my only innocence
sexual infanticide molds my pain as limitless
men hold morals less valuable then self image
why be ashamed for another mans evilness
*
empty messages to the untrained ear
yet closure to post traumatic peoples fear

Today Turned Tragic

Constant heart breaks when you're in love with an addict

Self centered feelings this time turned tragic

Family tradition, family formed bad habit

Her choice, my mistake, just close the casket

Whether she blowin dope or blowin for dope

She's 6 feet deep and I'm at the end of my rope

They taught me to fight for freedom with tragedy

So homicidal or suicidal just take this bullet from me

Me and her hope die together

A death so lonely ill miss her forever

She said shes beyond sick of me 

She was my life support shes what I need

If her life is hell shes just watching me burn

Painful sacrifice if I take her whole term

Shes hurt me beyond feelings but its worth the sentence

I'm at gates of hell missing her, hoping shes missing us

Less

Watching tears fall as I'm grasping the pistol to my head
Reminiscing on good deeds now eroded wondering if I’m better off dead
Bleeding out my one last tear for a broken southern promise
Crying my one last drop of blood from my lonely carcass

How can a man be so evil to deserve the life I lead
How am I a criminal if for freedom my blood was shed
I sleep to the sounds of death and screaming from my sergeants
The same screams that result me hiding behind narcotics

Flashbacks of fear that contradict the loving words that I've said
Unable to retrieve success but I'm no stranger to bleeding for bread
Years of a rough life had visions of turning me heartless
I've cried many tears searching  for love inside of my own darkness