No WAR

i remain faithful married to pain til death do us part living without sanity
they can't keep my memories for that's the only thing i left for my family
long night at grave site, tears fall onto the tombstone no loss just jealousy
defended freedom violently, take my life but my rifle will die concurrently
*
find beauty inside of pain then you are found to be beautiful
compassion in a time of war, not labeled love but delusional
war is pain, knowledge is power, murder is never excusable
i KNOW WAR my evidence is post traumatically irrefutable

Death at a Decline

envision me surrounded by sadness heard you hold onto happiness

I don't want to die like this but its my heart dying call it quits

your gone but i reminisce went from lover to nemesis

my death I only see benefits left me with emptiness

I'm still breathing not dead but the shoe does fit

you're leaving pain gone suicide permit

life lonely I'm safe as a hermit

I've already lived

now I'm done 

with

it

*

Reaching Against Predictable Endings

this depression weighs heavier then a blood soaked cloak from Jesus
write traumatic violence wrong direction my life creates perfect thesis
feel life slipping away gasping for a freedom drowning within my guilt
invisible dark addiction and violence that my chosen path lonely built
*

life has drained my energy no more motivation to be hyper-masculine
behind broken compassion no empathy pain shoved into my abdomen
"baby its cold outside" on these "summer nights" life forced aggression
hidden problems blamed on war but longer behavior of self destruction

*
no more room available for jackets my closet is overrun by skeletons
no more love on premises lost from my pain or surrounding elements
medicated moments where everyone is happy but my own conscience
deserved every bit of this pain learned that since days of adolescence

Heart Expired Love Lost

hard to distinguish if these are fictitious nightmares or merely memories

fall asleep with futile friends to awaken surrounded by justified enemies

alone against this world in a search for survival within a hierarchy of hate

decide your own destiny or add yourself a victim to a foreshadowed fate

*

blind to integrity if vision is lost in lies, no truth to see so I scratch out my own eyes

to Iraq and then back into a terrified society where a tear drops from silenced cries

man of peace yet I am forced to fight another war inside of my own deranged head

I kill my tragic memories view me a killer or hero but some words better left unsaid

*

something is wrong with me, I'm dangerous, but please don't leave me alone

words turn useless, like government intentions help spoken but never shown

confused I put war before college, discipline to honor just sign the documents

conscience can't contain consequence suicide by post traumatic incompetence

*

from feeling focused and outspoken, to too many lost chances hopeless and heartbroken 

tragedies comfort like a winters song, no casualties seen as right for war is always wrong

God’s bring belief and belief brings war, consider compassion only idea worth fighting for

perspiring pain soaks in blood forever, a death less lonely because pain and I die together

*

deny fear from disbandment of motivation war has no distraction only morals missing in action

hour glass is expiring waiting for life to end, peace is an idea incapable for U.S. to comprehend

define crazy, home turns into a war zone, nothing is safe, sun doesn't shine to reason unknown

in the mist of hell standing is a man left broken, with a tear in his eye signifying his last emotion

Mystery

I see images of that night over and over again
the way i imagined what things you did with him
it hurts my worst enemy is my own imagination
lead role in a whore movie no scenes only action
*
what help is love gonna do when all you know is pain
violence is the only thing associated with your name
i am so sick of being called a ticking time bomb
i just want to blow up and prove you all wrong
*
life's a contradiction just like our relationship was
I always listen to you but you swear no one does
what am i to you, besides your emotional zombie
same as you are to me just a question or mystery

Faceless

her eyes were far too pretty to cry these tears
smile so sufficiently innocent to face these fears
her prince charming had a rifle and army clothes
death and war see no face, just the way it goes
*
no one could understand the love she had for him
she shouted for help but no one hears her scream
they both made mistakes but they continued past them
he was going to be her other half to their perfect team
*
can't be denied heaven if an angel walks you there
country needed him to go but she wanted him here
she cried and pleaded for any chance to keep love
kept pictures but his touch she'd been deprived of
*
she feels her life slipping at the hands of Satan
strong but with him gone she begins to weaken
nothing can separate them when words live forever
love grows inside hearts, love keeps them together
*
hopeless, he fights for freedom and fights to make it back home
until a single bullet, takes another angel out of this combat zone
wrote a blank check to his country so they cashed it in his name
the cost of war was collected from a girl who never smiled again
********************************************************
war has no face if bullets have no brain, life leaves only empty photos
live for love as if, together its always sunny and apart it always snows
*********************************************************

Know Silence Know Surrender

never surrender any of your dreams despite the hand you are dealt
folks drunk or on meth broken home syndrome nothing is heartfelt
pipe dreams in the trailer park left families broken and nothing left
suicide by addiction you watch silently as they head toward death
*
everyone has their own story just deny fear thrown in your direction
people hold present plus past pain different, so don't judge addiction
Veteran Affairs try to fix anything with 60 minutes then a prescription
monkey sees but all a monkey can do is get himself a drug conviction
*
fear exploits violence within silent creativity if peace brightens clarity
people pleaded protection plus war yet couldn't handle the barbarity
matured by beatings with no retaliation, bleeding and bruised but still free
view us weak for P.T.S.D yet compassion creates guilt we are not crazy
*
compassion over currency with lack of perceptive reasoning from US history
dollars don't run the world excluding economy, deny money or deny equality
our colors don't run but we wear them blindly to live in a landfill of opportunity
war gave me pain and psychotherapy then injected dark problems inside of me
*
claim action without empathy self-interest turned to trend within society
respect earned with life given to charity or finding a solution to poverty
kids are starving give your life to compassion or sympathetically kill me
live righteously death held tears violently, refuse surrender or die silently

The Downfall to Things Lost in Time

search for love altered to gasping for air since you took my breath

still searching for something, repetitive regression reaches unrest

days spent pointing in the right direction and giving me a reason to breathe

love is blind and truth sets us free, love eerie when you're in it without me

* * * * *

looking for years, yet still so far away from what i need to find

sanity is just a theory, when you are already out of your mind 

survival in violence so combat inevitably becomes our only freedom

world war me or lonely in reality, concentration inside incarceration

* * * *

murdered better men then I have met so any gamble on life consider a lost bet

Iraq was wrong answer it made me a monster, Infantry the American gangster

no divorce from nightmares I'm depressed and distraught, pain alone is all i got

received hate I fought to be free defended this country yet no love left for me

* * *

standing at the mouth of hell's gate without you present and minus my smile

attending the trial of my future fate, all that is left, war guilt and criminal file

angels were around or I would've died in the components of that I.E.D attack

live life or walk dead, search through the sky but I can't bring you or him back,

* *

lost her and logic neither will miss me, overdose on pain add more to my suicidal history 

miserable morals met, so I paint painful portraits onto paper and portray them as poetry

drugs destroy silence yet don't determine my past as dirty,addiction creates controversy

wonder if it's sanity or you I'm missing, when I realize only these shadow creatures listen

*

summer sunny days remind me of all the good things lost in time,

rainy memories of cold dark nights I still called you mine

 my heart shatters like it's made of glass,

but my happiness is like you

 only in the past

Confined Chaos

men frequently speak heroically followed with actions perceived cowardly

pride comes before the fall swallowed perception of life happens inevitably

take me away death defeats disparity, pain nonexistent at least momentarily

life not fair but we are treated equally, freedom of speech embrace integrity

*

no where to run trapped inside of personal prison, no tears shown so sympathy not given

never feel safe yet perimeter is well protected, requiem resulted in a reality disconnected

not alone accompanied by mentality screaming, reminiscent hell yet hope beyond dreaming

success attempted but twined failure, capitulate eyes to close hopelessly absent of a savior

*

no honor present by persecuting others if we the people gave no permission

we are wrong to deny life to develop democracy, peace by political position 

social politics portray actions as if compassion is absurd without ammunition

discover personal development to reach an understanding without inquisition

*

If compassion kills, exceed a title of dangerous, become considered deadly

incur an ability,create confined chaos, beauty made visible in a world so ugly

self hatred shows no remorse, but project kindness to obtain positive distraction

leave hatred behind to find a new course before suicide turns crime of compassion

                                              

Left for Dead

Lonely reminiscing on old times, portray pictures of outlaw memories unlawful
Equalily relevant present reality complicates situation, be empty but sorrow full
From self improvement without optimism substituted by immoderate medication
To a product of environment manipulated by morals, survival seen in separation
*
Freedom irrevocably reached in America, no more stars and bars yet control is revoked and not ours
Ordained presidents, war over school, more money but less education, politically imprudent perception
Rendered services from the fallen, no more rent due to their country, rent to taxes books to battle axes
*
Destination dignity, decrepit and due for a dirt nap, never right, lost sight, every night disquietude
Enough bloodstains, credit for operation free Iraq, open eyes, deaf cries, enough lies, exactitude
Arise as rebels against evil tyrants, dramaturgy, brand name 9/11 war on insurgency let the bleeding begin
Determine history if good always win how do the good die young, no morals in the politics leading our men